Ocean Dreams

I'll never forget that first moment in which I experienced the ocean. Walking along trails with the family in the dark, nervous laughter when we realized what kind of wild animals could be watching us as we made our way down unfamiliar paths. We had already been able to hear the ocean when we arrived at our campsite, and it continued to become louder and louder as we made our way closer.
As it was almost dark when we arrived, we couldn't see much of anything. But we could hear the beauty.
There was a sense of terrifying yet amazing power as we listened to the low tide waves rolling onto the beach.
If ever I desperately desired daylight, it was then. I wanted to see this thing that tugged and pulled at my other senses.

The next morning I woke early and on the way back from a trip for two to the washroom, Mikaya and I shared the moment of beholding this wonder for the first time.

The sun rising over the horizon of endless blue sea.
God's canvas of colors filled the sky.
Birds running back and forth in time with the waves, eating their breakfast in the wet sand.
We stood staring, listening, breathing deeply the salty air.
The sounds reminded me of thunder continuously crashing. I wrestled with feelings of an awe inspired fear and an overwhelming fascination. The knowledge of how small we are and how big God is became reality in that moment as I took in the vastness and power of the ocean in front of me.
God's power, right before my eyes.

Those three days that were spent almost continually on the beach, were among the most amazing in my entire life.
I had imagined what it would be like to run along the beach, to play in the waves, to search for treasures while wading through the swelling waters.
But the mind didn't comprehend the spiritual aspect.
Experiencing for the first time the powerful beauty that God created.
Seeing His creatures playing in the waves.
Running alongside the beach with reckless abandon, freedom flowing through my veins.
Standing in the ocean watching the waves rise above my head, then crash down and sweep my bodily self to the shore.
Power and love. So gentle, yet so strong.
God's beauty and power personified.

Since we entered back into the country that we call our home, I think often about our ocean adventure.
The experience frequents my dreams. I never did dream about the ocean until I had been there.
Whether it be running, running and running along the sandy beach, seeing a blue whale surface in the water or being bitten by a shark... I still wake up happy whenever I see, hear, or feel the ocean in my sleep's thoughts.

How I wish to be there again.

Someday.

Today I did the happy dance....

Those were the words that my mom spoke to me this morning. And I immediately knew what that meant. 

This amazing mother of thirteen has reached her goal weight.

She has lost a total of 40 pounds!

I knew that she would never brag on herself, probably wouldn't have even mentioned it to anyone but us (her family) but I also know that she deserves more then that. So I have taken it upon myself to give her some recognition for all that she has accomplished since March of last year.

Mom has worked SO incredibly hard. 

She had every excuse to say "I can't", but chose instead to say "I can". 

She pushed through the daily toil of mothering a multitude, the distractions and unsettled routine of being a farmer's wife, the stress that homeschooling children can bring, the emotions of giving a daughter away in marriage, the pregnancy and birth of her thirteen child, the discouragement of the dreaded plateau, and the pain and sorrow of loosing a child to miscarriage.

She had worked through it.

Now she is reaping her rewards in full. 

It is not uncommon for her to be mistaken for her daughter's sisters, and she has lately told tales of people barely recognizing her. (which really isn't hard to believe considering she is smaller then her pre-marriage weight). 

I know all of our family members beam with pride each time we hear her being complimented as she runs into people she hasn't seen in a while.

I'm proud of her.

She is an inspiration to me, and I know that she is an inspiration to many others. 

(Before)

(After)

Congratulations Mom!!!

You did it!!!

Crazy life/ Auntie's announcement

My life has taken a turn for the crazy.
And I can sum it all up in one word… babysitting.
Due to some unexpected circumstances… I have been doing a lot of it.
While mom and dad were on their annual mini vacation (Dad's birthday celebration), while Kerri had an ultrasound for ongoing stomach issues (getting some answers soon!), while Mikaya had an appendicitis attack (she spend the night in the hospital, but recovered without surgery), and while mom and dad help Megan with her new baby as she is recovering from a c-section (yes… AUNTIE AGAIN!!!).

Since Kerri has been pretty much out of commission (only able to help out verbally), I have been experiencing what life would be like if I had 9 kids.
It is crazy. But the fun kind of crazy. (no shortness of popcorn and movie nights ;)
There have been times when I have felt sorry for myself. But I've come to realize that everything, every season in life happens for a reason, God must be preparing me for a challenge up the road.
As a result of this realization, I am learning to embrace these moments and to do my best in every situation.

Anyway… enough of that. The real reason for this post is to announce a status change in my aunthood.
I am now auntie to 4!!!
As I already previously mentioned, Henry and Megan's baby was born!!
Silas Uriah Froese came into this world on January 12, 2014.
He is such a sweet baby boy and I have already fallen head over heals in love with this sweet face…

Picture taken by his mommy (Phraze Photography)

So that is an update on my life :)
Hopefully things will slow down a bit soon so that I will have more time to blog, but until then… adios.

2014 Resolutions

Photograph credit: Joanna Froese

Well folks, it is here.
2014.
Yesterday I tossed the idea of writing a resolution post back and forth in my head. I love writing resolutions for the new year, but usually more on a private, personal level, not sharing them with anyone (much less on the internet).
I also had reservations because I feel that one shouldn't start trying to become a better person only beginning on a certain day. (Monday, the new year ect.) But rather should always, everyday be striving to be a better version of who God made us to be.
But one of my new resolutions is to become more real. And what better way to kick off that real-ness... than to write a blog post about how I want me to look like this year.
So here we go...

Personal Resolutions:

{Resolution 1}
To become more resolute.

resolute |ˈrezəˌloōt; -lət|adjectiveadmirably purposeful, determined, and unwavering 

When I dig deep within myself, I find a lack of determination. I dream big, but then tend to fail in long term execution. When it gets too hard, I quit.
I want to work on deciding to do something, then following through until the finish.

{Resolution 2}
To beat low self-esteem.

self-esteemnounconfidence in one's own worth or abilities; self-respect : 

Not in a prideful way that says "I love me" but rather "I love who God has made me to be".
Not the attitude of "I can do anything" but rather "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me".
There was a time in my life where I constantly needed human approval to be confident or satisfied with anything that I did or said. It is an area of my life that I have already approved in, I would just like to take it to the next level and beat it!

{Resolution 3}
To take more advantage of writing inspiration.

inspiration |ˌinspəˈrā sh ən|noun1 the process of being mentally stimulated to do or feel something, esp. to do something creative: 

Especially when it comes to this blog. There are so many times during my day (especially late at night, when I'm running, and when I am milking) that I will have this "inspiration moment" and I'll write an entire blog post in my head. But time gets away from me, and I'll either forget about it, or when I finally sit down to write, the moment is gone and I lose the words.
I didn't know where those "moments" came from until I had the idea to write a post that I had titled "Just Do It".
I was going to act on it (as to be non-hypocritcal) then write it, but as I already explained often happens... it all slipped away.
A couple of weeks later our Pastor preached a message titled the same and it was pretty much exactly what I had wanted to say in my post (just much more detailed, researched and scripturally based of course :).
It was then that I realized that perhaps that "inspiration" was not just coming from my lively brain. Maybe I had missed God's moment to work through me.
This resolution is to work on not missing it.

{Resolution 4}
To become a runner.

runner |ˈrənər|noun1 a person who runs, esp. in a specified way.• a person who runs competitively as a sport or hobby

I want to compete in a 5K, 10K, Half-marathon as well as a full marathon.  I want to increase training intensity (WITHOUT injury!!), do cross training, speed training, run hills. I'm even considering a runner's diet.
I want to become a runner.

{Resolution 5}
To read God's word and spend time with Him every day.

everyday |ˈevrēˌdā|adjective [ attrib. ]happening or used every day; daily• commonplace : 

Pastor T just preached a sermon a couple weeks ago about how we need to make room in our every day for the One who ought to be the King of our everyday lives.
My goal, above everything else is to put Him first this year, as well as every year for the rest of my life.

Blogging resolutions:

{Resolution 1}
To become more real.

real 1 |ˈrē(ə)l|adjective1 actually existing as a thing or occurring in fact; not imagined or supposed used to emphasize the significance or seriousness of a situation or circumstance Philosophy relating to something as it is, not merely as it may be described or distinguished.2 true or actual

It's not very often that I open up and really expose my true feelings. I want to share more of who I really am with you all this year. To be vulnerable and share some of what I struggle with, things that I have overcome. I don't want to be a complainer, but I also want people to be able to relate with me and my life.

{Resolution 2}
To blog every day for one month of this year
This would be a really tough one for me, but I believe that it would be easier for me to be more real, if I had to blog every day in my very real life.

{Resolution 3}
To pick an month in which I post a picture with myself in it every day.
To coincide with becoming more "real" as well as kicking that low self-esteem. I've always loved it when photographers take up that challenge to post a picture of themselves every day. I'm no photographer... but I love a good challenge :)

There are more resolutions that I have for this year, including the typical "lose weight and get fit". But I'll spare you.
At the end of this year, (unless I don't have access to internet, the Lord comes back, or I'm dead :) I'll do a follow-up of each resolution in detail.

That's it that's all!
Oh, one more thing.
It was my big brother in-law's birthday a couple days ago (Happy birthday Henry!!), my sweet Grandma's birthday yesterday (Happy birthday Grams!!!), and my big brother's birthday today (Happy birthday Josh!!) 

Happy New Year Everyone!!!