Learning

I haven't written about running for a long time.
Probably because for a long time, I didn't run. Coming off of an injury, I guess I became afraid to do much more than a couple of runs here and there before losing motivation.

I've had this idea for a long time to host a race, beginning from our yard and ending at a historic hill near our area called "Star Mound". This spring, I finally became brave enough to go for it, and so... training for the "High Five Race" began.

The first couple of weeks were great. besides being insanely out of shape. I was taking it slow, and enjoying myself.
But then, I got runner's knee. I wanted to cry when it happened. It was super frustrating because I wasn't even running that far before becoming injured... again. I just wanted to run without dealing with that. My biggest obstacle, is not knowing how to recover from injury in the midst of training. For some reason it scares me and I usually give up before I recover or I just power through it.

I took a month off of training. When I was able, I began to cross train, because lack of it was a big reason that I got runner's knee.

That first run after the break was terrifying. I wanted so bad to just run without injury, so I said a prayer. And I have said the same prayer every run since.
I said "God, I will give it my all, if you take care of my knees, and my shins, and my whole body while you're at it.  I just want to be a runner. Please help me to become a runner."

Once I came back to the same training day that the injury happened on, I felt my knees complaining and I literally ran yelling "I will not fear, I will not fear" over and over. I made it though.

Now, I am running farther than I ever have before without pain (well, running is never pain free... but you know what I mean. :), and I am scheduled to run my first 10k since last year this weekend.

I am learning.

I am learning to listen, not only to my body, but also to God. He doesn't always speak in a loud voice, and it takes practice to hear what He is saying.

I am learning to have faith, faith that if I do what I believe I am called to, God will do the rest. I believe that God cares about every detail of our lives. And if we ask Him and it is His will, He will be there for us, to help us when we ask.

I am learning to persevere. Even when it gets tough. Even when I have a bad day and don't do everything perfectly. Even when I feel like giving up.
Just. Keep. Going.

I am learning that I can do it. I can do all things, through Christ who gives me strength. He gave the promise, but I still have to do. Some days it seems like I will never make it, but suddenly I find myself looking back and being in awe of how far God has brought me.

It's my race to win.