Saturday, June 17, 2017

Jesus Is Not My Boyfriend

Why don't you have a boyfriend? I have had this question directed to me on numerous occasions. In a world where society expects the unattached to always have a boyfriend or girlfriend, or to be on a hunt for one, it is easy to allow negative thoughts to enter like, "Maybe I'm not normal."

But the truth is this, we were not given the opposite sex to use and throw away. The dating game, the having a boyfriend or girlfriend just because we can or because it is what is done, it was not God's design.
He created love and marriage. He created purity and intimacy.
He also created friendship, which is what I wish more teenagers would focus on, instead of getting into premature relationships.

Am I saying that dating is evil? No.
What I am against, is dating for no purpose.
Dating just to have a good time, for fun.
I have friends who have chosen to only date when they feel like they are ready for a committed relationship, and I give them mad props for that.

Sometimes singleness is a choice. I am not single because there is something wrong with me. I am single because I have committed to only date/court someone whom I feel like I could potentially spend the rest of my life with.

But then there are the questions. "Why are you single? Why have you never had a boyfriend?"
Some answer with a statement that kind of (if I'm being honest) upsets me.

"Jesus is my boyfriend."


First of all, in this day and age, to give God, my Lord, the One who died on the cross for my sins, a title like "boyfriend" is like calling a diamond a rock.
Even a really amazing boyfriend can leave, can break your heart... Jesus would never do that.
Jesus himself calls the church his wife. His bride. Dumbing Him down to a very human and often impure relationship is... disrespectful.
Secondly. Saying that Jesus is your boyfriend is like grasping for straws, the NEED for a boyfriend so great that you have to plop Jesus down to that level in your life. He didn't come to fulfil our human desires, He came so that we could have fulfillment beyond our human desires.
Plus, what happens when you do get a boyfriend? Does Jesus get replaced? He doesn't want to be a temporary fix, He wants to be your everything.

Being single, ya, it sometimes gets lonely. And no, it is not easy to abstain from temporary relationship while I wait for a permanent one. There is a void, I acknowledge it and accept it because God created it. His design was for a man and woman to become one.
But I don't try to fill this void with a "Jesus boyfriend". Instead I find fulfillment in allowing Jesus to be all that He wants to be in my life. I find joy in serving Him. I am satisfied to get to know Him better as a single woman.

To my fellow humans who are faithfully waiting for that special person God is preparing for you, hang in there. This sacrifice will produce beautiful fruit in you life. One day we will all look back and realize what all of this waiting was for.
Until then, stay strong.


Anonymous said...

I love this Jennifer. It's so true! Thanks for sharing. ~Jordie

Julie said...

I don't know you, but I have been reading your blog and your Mom & sister n laws for a while. I came to find them through the Muncks blog a few years back. We live about 5 minutes from them here in TN. & I used to babysit their 3 oldest girls (that's been a few years back). Anyway, I love this post!!! We have been teaching our kids this very thing. They are 15 & 13. Its difficult now days because everyone expects young people to have a boyfriend/girlfriend. And at such a young age people start asking and teasing. Its a little easier because we homeschool. As a parent it is a joy to see that others are teaching the same thing. I appreciate you bringing this subject to light and staying true to your beliefs. You are the kind of young lady I encourage my daughter to look up to. Thank you! Have a blessed day!

Josh and Rebecca Pauls said...

Love this post. So much truth. You are a wise young woman! Love you! 😍